Brian didn’t realize how messed up his worldview was until he saw for himself the cracks. Meanwhile Kate itemized the consequences he’d have to face if he didn’t get his head screwed on straight.
The problem was Brian could no longer see the meaningless splatter as anything but garbage. Fifty years from now, perhaps, they’d wish they did things differently, but now, to stop the throbs of screaming, Brian and Kate split up.
Kate met a succession of knights sparkling with possibilities until their dragons (or her own) appeared. Brian covered the canvas with snow white pigment to hide the cracks and bury a voice coming from a source deeper than his own distracting addictions.
Denise offers “canvas” as the word to be used in this week’s Six Sentence Stories.
Intriguing story, Frank. Well done.
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Thank you, Dan!
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Very profound symbolism in your story Frank 👍🏼
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Thank you, Sadje!
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You’re welcome
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This one has me thinking a lot. There is a lot to chew on here: “Brian covered the canvas with snow white pigment to hide the cracks and bury a voice coming from a source deeper than his own distracting addictions.”
Shalom!
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I left both of those characters without a good resolution. Hopefully within the next fifty years (or sooner) they will repent and do more than cover up their problems. Thank you, Michael!
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One of your best ever, Frank. Loved this line. ‘Kate met a succession of knights sparkling with possibilities until their dragons (or her own) appeared.’
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I am glad you liked that part about Kate. I wanted to make sure she had a few dragons as well. Thank you, Doug!
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Excellent piece, Frank, but rather bleak in its outlook!
And thanks for subscribing to my YouTube Channel, I hope you found something else you liked.
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You’re welcome. The story is bleak, but maybe there will be a second part. Thank you!
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As “onlooker”, difficult to determine – was their decision to split the better but more difficult one to make? Or was it the easiest, providing immediate relief?
Sentence 3 tells us Brian’s state of mind had reached a point of no return. Kate perhaps, relieved.
Well done, Frank.
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Thank you, Denise! They shouldn’t have split up because they weren’t facing their problems, but it is not easy to pass by the fast solution providing immediate relief.
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Their problem is not that they were merely wrong for each other. Neither could ever really handle being with anyone else either…well done
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Good point. They should have stayed together and learned how to live with another human being.
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Wowza, Frank!!!
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Thank you, Zelda! It a depressing tale and I should probably come up with a redeeming part 2.
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Whatever you wish, however you’re inspired…I’ll be reading you! 🙂
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Well done. Perhaps the snow white canvas gives him hope, although what lays underneath will eventually have to be a faced square on.
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That’s a good point. Whatever it is he is covering up will have to be faced square on. Thank you, Pat!
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real writing, real craftsmanship. good six.
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I am glad you liked this. Thank you, Paul!
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What a thought-provoking and profound piece, Frank! Well done.
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Thank you, Eugenia!
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My pleasure, Frank!
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I have read the story three times over and the comments too and can’t get past it being anything but a friendly little difference of opinion.
I think it’s the “get his head screwed on straight” that seemed familiar, too familiar, that made me come to that conclusion. I’ve used it sooo many times. 😉
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May that be all it is. They should get back together and get both of their heads screwed on straight. Thank you!
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When I can’t make up anything fancy to say, I just tell the truth. 🙂
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damn!*
Visual and, yet, suggestive…inviting the Reader to see the world in their own terms.
killer line: “…but now, to stop the throbs of screaming, Brian and Kate split up.”
a compliment on a simple, engaging and yet open-to-the-Reader’s participation**
** as is usually the case with good stories
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I am glad you liked the “throbs of screaming” and found the story engaging. Thank you, Clark!
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Such stunning use of the word Canvas for an impactful story!
“bury a voice coming from a source deeper than his own distracting addictions.” so amazingly said. That voice has so much wisdom but for our willingness to listen.
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May we all listen when He calls. Thank you, Pragalbha!
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It’s a tale too often told. To live the real fairy tale takes lots of work.
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Good point. The real fairy tales takes a lot of work. Thank you, Mimi!
I liked your story about getting a new phone and not being able to figure out how to use it. That recently happened to me. I still don’t know how to use much of it.
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Best that they split up – especially if it stopped the throbs of screaming (a great line!).
To be able to reflect fifty years later suggests they are fairly young – good enough time to grow and find happiness with their own selves.
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I imagined them to be very young (at least decades younger than I am). I am glad you liked the “throbs of screaming”. Thank you!
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Awesome use of language, Frank! You’ve introduced two troubled characters in a difficult situation. I’d like to see what develops in part two.
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There may be a part two. I am glad you liked this, Chris! Thank you!
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Sobering unmasking of bad worldviews
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I left the characters without a peaceful resolution, but may those in a similar situation find one. Thank you, Jim!
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Without a resolution it also makes it a standstill and realistic
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You can only run and hide for so long. Well done, Frank.
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Thank you, Mark!
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When you’re up to your A$$ in alligators, it’s hard to remember your objective was to drain the swamp.
Too bad they were so busy fighting themselves that they didn’t see each other as allies.
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Good point. People lose the battle by fighting against each other rather than working together to drain the swamp.
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Oh, you can only cover the cracks for so long. Great Six, Frank.
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Those cracks keep appearing. Thank you!
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So well written, Frank!
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Thank you!
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